Classic Jesus Moves....

Lying here in bed thinking about my past brought to mind the story of the woman who the pharisees and saduccees busted whoring with a married man.... now we know that they wanted to stone the harlot, but it seems like the guy got off scott free, even though he was essentially a man whore... so here is what im thinking.... Jesus responded by telling the religious leaders that the one who was with out sin should throw the first stone..... none of them could cause they were all guilty. If we were to relate this to today, one thing that comes to mind is the different way that Christians treat homosexuals and heterosexuals in unbiblical relationships.... (aka, pre marital sex) It seems like the church will make excuses at times for the heterosexual couple who isnt married, maybe not even living together, but are still having sex. These relationships are a lot like the man whore who got away in the bible... but then the church looks at homosexuals, and instead of reaching out to them in love, as Jesus reached for the harlot; instead of bringing them into a safe place and defending them as people, we cry out for our politicians to make "gay marriage" illegal, or to keep it from ever becoming legal. My question to the church is "REALLY?!?" that kind of beligerence and lack of Christ type love and respect will turn unbelievers away everytime... im not saying we have to agree, but GOD gave men free will to choose, and who are we to try to take that choice away, unless we are willing to give up our equal and opposite rights... If Jesus had wanted, he could have thrown the first stone.... he was the only one with out sin.... we spend so much time casting stones, that we miss the opportunity to look a lost soul in the eyes and say "i got your back!  Now, GO! And sin no more!" I think the church could win more souls by loving than political agendas, that love can cast out fear and break sins hold on many, if only we would drop the stones and pick up our brothers and sisters hearts, and learn how to love again.... Im just saying.

Life like ashes

So, basically life feels like a bunch of ashes right now. Everyday my faith is challenged by my circumstances, and I find that i spend more time rationalizing my feelings away than I spend acknowleging i even have feelings. My marriage has failed, i work a crappy job and see no hope for my future, but inspite of all these things, i say as Job said, "though he slay me, yet  will i praise him".

in some ways while i hate the way life is right now, i appreciate that it is bringing back to basics, and teaching me more about the woman I am and the woman i am becoming... so Satan, bring it, and God get me through it.... burn away the chaff, refine me like silver and carry me because otherwise, im not gonna make it.

mary and martha and me

I am a server, not by profession, but my personality is one that loves to help others. i like helping in whatever way i can and sometimes I get a little carried away. recently it was pointed out to me that maybe Jesus just wants me to stop and praise and worship and thank him instead or running myself ragged trying to serve him in just the right way so that i can please him and others. it was a reminder to me that taking time to praise worship and thank the master is every bit as important to him, and maybe more so, as it is to serve him.i'm very good at being martha, but i struggle to just sit at his feet in awe of who he is and what he has done. not because im ungrateful, but because im a doer.... Lord, today make me as much a worshipper as i am a server.

Super heated for a purpose

well, i am sure that most everyone will know the story of how silver is refined, so im gonna break it down real quick like. To purify silver and make it 100% pure, silver has to be super heated and every impurity burned out. Well, welcome to the silver life of Jackelyn..... God has got the culdron of my life super heated so hot i think i might burn up with the dross!!! Jesus, Kill my flesh, and leave nothing but you behind.... and in that process of refining and burning, would you help me not to jump out of the culdron! You know the thing about life is that no matter how painful it feels, God is working and doing something... even when we cant see it. I just wish i were more willing.... I struggle with my flesh to make it lay there and DIE it keeps trying to hop off the altar and that just wont do, seeing as i am called to follow Jesus' example. Right now i feel like trading lives with anyone but i know that I would still be fighting the changes of something, so no matter how painful my life is, Lord, refine me!!!!!!! I am believing that when all the dross is burned away from my life, when every attitude has been changed and every impurity in my heart is dealt with, that I will resemble Christ more than i do now.... in the mean time, my aunt made an excellent statement... "your tradgeties can define you or destroy you... you're the one who makes the choice" Lord, i want my tradgeties to redefine me, to bring definition to my character, so super heat me and bring out every impurity that needs dealt with at this time. Amen!!!!

relationships and emotions

so here's the thing, when you decide to love someone, you have to love all them. sometimes thats harder than it sounds. Case in point; marriage. Sometimes a persons spouse does things that can crush you emotionally. what do you do then? my emotions tell me to do what my flesh says, but my faith says to do what my Lord says. Jesus said to forgive and keep on forgiving. does that mean I forget, or keep trusting someone? NO! but i have to give my loved ones a chance to redeem themselves, and that takes faith! it would be so easy to just hold the grudge, but God has called us as Christians to a higher mode of operation, to forgive and to give opportunity for change, to redeem themselves, and to redeem their soul. Whoever thought being a christian was easy was smoking crack... being a Christian takes more determination and thought, than  just doing what I want.

On Faith; the first of many to come, but perhaps not all in sucession.

About a week or so ago, I went to my sisters house to hang with her and her husband. Now, I am a Christian, and pentecostal at that. I've never really given it a second thought, but in sitting with them and answering some of the questions I was asked, it occurred to me, that when people who are not Christians, or who are not familiar with church, hear about different kinds of Christianity, it can be quite confusing. Afterall, what is the difference between catholisism and Christian? And what makes a pentecostal different that a baptist, a lutheran, a presbeterian, methodist and episcopalian? These are only a few denominations of Christianity, and yet already many will be confused. What has happened to the Church as Jesus described? He never said there were churches, there was just the Church, the Bride of Christ, all one, though many parts of a single body. While i think it isn't how Jesus intended for the church to be, (separated because of doctrine) I think there is something to be said for the various denominations of Christianity. First of all, not everyone will feel comfortable with a pentecostal church. Pentecostals get loud, and they are vibrant, more like a bon fire than a candle sometimes. It can really be culture shock when you go from not believing in anything, to believing that Jesus Christ is the Son of God, and when pentecostals break it down at worship, lets face it, an unchurched person might think, "What a bunch a FREAKS!"

I learned a long time ago, the value of building faith and knowing what it will cost a person. When I was a teenager, i gave my life to Christ, but i didn't understand what that meant  until many years later, in my early 20's. Now, as much as I want someone to get saved, I feel obligated to make them aware of the cost, which is everything. God knows I have a long way to go, that I am imperfect in everyway, except in the light of his grace, but I know that as I keep giving up certain things, I am rewarded accordingly. I have a lot to learn as far as the differences in the denominations of Christianity, and as I study, and learn, I will share it with you, and I'll write about other stuff too. I just was thinking on this today, so I thought I'd write it out, and ya'll can tell me what ya think.

Welcome to the 21st century

Ok, so after a long time of avoiding the blog, i have recinded my hiatus and decided to start blogging, if for no other reason than to share with whom ever wants to hear and my own sanity. I was actually opposed to blogging, mostly because i felt like whatever i said wouldnt be read, but then I realized, who cares? I like to write, and I have LOTS of opinions, so why not share them. If no reads them, then at least I got it off my chest with out pissing someone off. That being said, there will be more to come, but for now, I'm off to do my thing.